Sharon flew off today.
I miss having her around.
Her thoughtfulness and generosity simply amazes me.

Despite my hesitance, i have to admit that i'm feeling too stressed out.
It's a mechanism that is part of me and i've accepted it.
My appetite shrinks and i lose sleep, but i just can't calm the nerves.
I do not feel good enough. period.

I'm putting in effort, to try my best.
For i know that i can't simply give up at everything.
Thank you my dearest friends, whom have been there for me.
Always assuring me when my sense of incompetency overwhelms me.
It makes this world a much endurable place.
I promise to give my best shot and not to let you all down.

When she comes close to me, my body instinctively wants to glide away.
But i hold the physical frame there, so that she doesn't feel sad.
Inside, every molecule scatters.
It's all in the head.
I'm sorry.
I just can't trust her, can't.