I tell myself that i never want to be like her.
there's a saying.."when you don't know what to do, you do what you know."
so, there are occurrences where i do what she does.
it frightens me and makes me really mad with myself.

We are starting to move on with our lives.
and how i wish i can start on a clean slate.
Having the boys around certainly changed the dynamics of the family.
we started to communicate more, manage our lives responsibly.
basically we started to interact more with them in the family.
thank you ray and nutmeg.!